Thursday, December 21, 2006

208 - Just Simply Living...

Dear Lord, thank you for the wonderful prayer time this morning. I felt as if You were sitting right next to me just holding my hand. Clay and I stayed up really late last night as we were packing more and more boxes. We are really down to the nitty gritty and we should be since the movers come tomorrow. Last night we went out to eat with Chad and Faith one last time.

Clay has gone to his men's group one last time. I wonder if he will have something like that over there? I am so thankful he gets to see Eric Little. They have always been so close and have so many memories. Lord, i pray you bless their time this morning and allow it to be the most special.

Hosea - on to chapter 12. We are dealing with Israel's sin. As i was pondering more about this book yesterday in the midst of packing, the Lord asked me a great question. He impressed on my heart not to just think about my sin and the different offenses i commit against Him, but why... Why do i do a particular sin? What is behind it? I have to say just in my brief moments of thought that most of time insecurities are behind many of my sins. The feeling of not measuring up and so therefore sins of 1) trying to impress, 2) being jealous of those that have done more, 3) over indulging, 4) not being thankful for what i have or have done or can do, 5) having no faith that He is going to do anything through me 6) panicking over the future and past......................... Why do i do what i do? Reveal it to me...

In this chapter the Lord compares the nation of Israel to Jacob wrestling with God. Jacob would not let go until He was blessed. I really need to look more into that study. I have studied it many times, but it always intrigues me. Anyway, God gives a bottom line kind of statement. It is much like the Micah 6:8 kind of statement, but in Hosea 12:6. "But you must return to your God; maintain love and justice and wait for your God always."

Maintain love and mercy. My commentary said it was very easy for some to love and go as far as overlooking sin. And then there were some that were totally into justice and dropping the hammer. But to maintain love and mercy is something one can only do through the power of the Holy Spirit, but a bottom line kind of expectation for us. "And wait for your God always." Oh that is where i feel like i am right now. Waiting on God - what is next, who is next, is anything next. I have not gotten a new engagement in many weeks and that honestly scares me, but this is also a time that no one is making any plans. I did hear from the church in Shelbyville and they have decided to go with a home grown speaker. I was so looking forward to that and really felt i was suppose to go. So i wait. I wait for God to do more and I beg His favor and mercy.

Lord Jesus - wow this is such a crazy time. Just waiting on You to do the next thing. What will that be? Will anyone take the book? Will anyone want me to come to their church? Will I ever get to establish a ministry? I really honestly do not know what You are doing right now with me? I am so thankful that i feel content and peaceful and am so thankful for the future. It is bright because You are the Morning Star. You are so awesome and I want to see Your glory!!!

Show me the next step. I want to walk in Your ways! I love you!

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