Wednesday, May 31, 2006

Throwing Spears

Lord Jesus - we are on to 2 days in a row of summer jogging. Thank you for getting me up and moving. It is hard, but I know I have to do it or it will not get done during the day. Things are just too busy with Tucker's All-Star baseball. He has practice almost every night next week, etc. I am really excited though because I know he enjoys it so much and I love to watch him do so well and have fun, but at the same time seeing him get really emotional when he messes up! It is great to see him finally feel something about his sport than just not care whether he wins or loses! He is a great kid!

This morning I was reading that little book on brokenness again and scriptures about King Saul and David. I loved the point it made about David not throwing spears! Saul did everything possible including throwing spears to end David's life, but David was able to dodge them all. What kept David from picking up the spear and throwing it back? What kept him from taking Saul's life on the numerous occasions he had a chance to? What kept David from charging the throne and taking over? I mean Samuel had already anointed him as the next King and he trusted in God's plan for his life, so why didn't David just hurry up the matters?

I don't know and the devotional book answers the questions by saying only God knows!! Boy that can be frustrating when you are the one sitting in the hot seat not guilty at all, only guilty a small bit, or guilty of it all and not allowed to throw the spears back because the Lord says no. I have been in that situation. I have been guilty of none, of a little, and guilty of all and God has told me in all occasions - "Keep your mouth shut! Let me handle this and let me do the vindicating in time." He always comes through and He always handles things much better than me! Why can I not stop myself from throwing the spears at times?? Self-control!!

Brokenness - I am not sure what that requires, I am not sure what that looks like, I am not sure you know it until you are there! I know God needed a broken servant before He made him the ruling king. God brought David to the point of not wanting even life - just to get away from it all and be with His Lord. Then in God's time, he brought David to the place of exalted king of human race. Lord, I know the things you are doing in my life. I have been broken before you and that does not feel good. But the restoration you are doing in my heart as I type this is just beautiful. I know you will never come to a completion time while I am on this earth, but some day I will be made in your likeness completely! Oh for that wonderful day! Keep breaking Lord, keep restoring, keep molding, and keep pursuing! I want to stay close! I love you! Amen!

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