Thursday, January 10, 2008

512 - New Year's Resolutions - Tift

Dear Lord, you know the plans I have for today and I commit them to you. I have an important meeting this morning and I have some others things as well that are important to me. Lord, give me wisdom and solid thoughts. Give me confidence and gentle boldness. Give me patience and much, much love!! Thank you in advance for taking care of things!

Lord, I have tift or is it a rift...... anyway... with myself and other things I have been reading. I decided to not verbally say or make any new years resolutions and all over the web I saw the same things from many of the fellow Christian bloggers. I saw things like - I am not going to make any kind of resolution this year. I am just going to pursue Godliness or Grace or Righteousness, etc. I thought or maybe even said the same thing. I guess there are several reasons for that. 1) Don't want everyone to know I have failed again. 2) Don't want to be like everyone else. 3) Don't want to make promises that I can not keep again. 4) Think it is hokey and just a silly thing anyway. My list could go on and on. But then again I vowed probably just to myself that I did want to resolve to pray more and more diligent about my Bible studying. That is noble and a good thing - many bloggers had the same idea or convictions...

So what is my problem. I am willing to commit to do or be better at what God is obviously in or is about, but those things that I have to invite Him into I am not willing to commit. Lord Jesus, this is what I feel you saying to my heart..........God is all about me praying, God is all about me studying His Word - those are givens and frankly I don't think I could ever actually reach the mark or my goal at being a proficient prayer(er) or knowing all the Word let alone in one year. When I do become proficient or know all the Word I think He will just take me home. But those other things such as losing weight, diminishing my computer time, getting an accountability group together, getting my ministry and office organized and stay organized, staying on a budget, etc.......... Those are all things that God is "in", but it is not so obvious because we have to take Him there in sort of a way.

Here is my point I feel the Lord convicting me about. If we want to see change in our lives we have to commit it to Him. Doing things on our own will never work. We have to bring God into every single area of our lives. He has to be in our weight loss. He has to be in our financial pursuits. He has to be in our thoughts of organization. He has to be in it all. And He is. Since He is living inside of me - I am the temple of the Holy Spirit I Cor. 6:19 - I am taking Him everywhere and in everything. He is there when I am able to not indulge and yet He is quenched when I blow it and eat too much! He is there when I think I have to have that skirt (or rather baseball cap for me), but know better. My Lord and Savior is begging me to take Him into every area of my life. He wants to be in more than my prayer closet, He wants me to take Him into my kitchen, into my workout room (if i had one), into my clothes closet, into my purse, etc. He wants and will have access into every area of my life - especially my thoughts!

Lord, what is it that I am afraid of? Am i afraid that I won't please you? Am i afraid that I won't be accepted after failure? Am I afraid that someone will actually hold me accountable? Am I afraid to be vulnerable to the World Wide Web? What is it Lord? Vulnerability has never been an issue for I don't think. I am what I am and am not too much on hiding. Many, many other things are my issue, but that is not one that I see at this time. I have a good friend that is being called by the Lord to expose all this year - be completely vulnerable at all costs. It is beautiful! I am shocked at how many people deal with this issue. I had no idea! But for me - and Lord, help me to be vulnerable here - I just don't take the Lord into enough areas of my life. If i did I think I would have more self-control when I sat down to eat. I would have more self-control when I am talking among friends. I would be able to walk away from a killer sale that says I have got to have one more black pair of pants. I would have more discipline about my computer time. I would not worship any others gods is what it boils down to!!

So Lord, there it is. I want to live the victorious life. I want to be committed to everything you have called me to. I want to hear your voice in every area of my life. I want you to have full reign over me in everything , i mean everything! I want to be skinny, I want to be organized, I want to be a prayer warrior, I want to be in an accountability group, I want to be financially responsible................. I want you, Lord!!! I want you to have your way with me! I want it all - what you have for me. I know that I can not and will not be faithful in any of these ares without your help, guidance, push, discipline, and moment by moment involvement in my life!! I want to feel your breath......... always. Thank you for this or rather these convictions Lord. Forgive me for not taking you with me in all areas of my life. Forgive me for thinking or at least by my actions saying I can do it on my own. Forgive me for my pride and forgive me for not believing You! Lord, here we go! Off to another victoriously living day!! Victory in Jesus!


Anonymous said...

How blessed that our gracious and Heavenly Father leads us to Him and to each other! I say this because last night at our church prayer meeting, we meditated and prayed Psalm 20. It is all about living victoriously in Jesus and giving the glory to God. Not only are we to give Him glory in our victories, but in the victories of our brothers and sisters as well. I have decided to claim it for this year or until He tells me otherwise. If you're not familiar with it, go find, pray it and claim it too!
Blessings & Hugs my sisters!

Leigh Gray said...

Thanks for your comment, Anonymous! Even though I wish i knew who you were. ha ha!

Ps. 20 is my lifetime prayer for my husband. I pray that often for him. and my kids as well.

Victory in Jesus - have a wonderful day!

Fran said...

To pursue Him passionately, to love Him with all you have, to seek Him daily, and to bring Him to're doing all those things girl. We aren't perfect and never will be...until with Him. I pray that you do all these things above.....every single day. If so, you have had a glorious day with Jesus. Keep it simple sista!!

Love ya!

Tracy Berta-daughter to the King, wife, mother, speaker, writer said...

Oh, sister, amen and amen and amen! I, too, wrote out resolutions and was going to write the same "old"- lose weight, be more organized, be more fiscally responsible, but God led me to other things- my relationship with Him and my family being most important......

How I love your heart, Leigh!