Thursday, February 28, 2008

547 - It's Just Weird - I'm Just Sayin'

Dear Lord - OK, now I am really weirded out. I am almost embarrassed to even mention it because there seems like there has been so much lately. More physical issues with my health............ When your life is put through the ringer it is easy to say Spiritual warfare, etc. But as it continues on - the warfare - it begins to make you wonder. You know a recent thought I have been thinking is how incredibly prideful it is to rationalize drama, trauma, and trials as warfare. Like I am the one that can decide this is satan toying with me or if there is sin in my life. I am not sure how to go about it. It has had me stumped! Stunned me and paralyzed me - sort of. Just humbling and such! But then again another humbling thought is about blogging. We all blog for different reasons.................why would I believe anyone would want to know what is going on with me other than my relationship with Him????? On my brain hurts!

Just briefly - I want to focus on my Lord and not me - but just so anyone reading understands - I am not myself right now. It is the weirdest thing ever. I did get sick with that cellulistis on my nose and had to take some high powered antibiotics and steroids! Well, long story hopefully short - I had a reaction to the steroids. I picked up a car and threw it - just joking! No, but seriously, every cell in my body is shaking, yes I am so lethargic it is incredible. I am wired, yet depleted! I feel like i have a sun-burn all over me, but there is no redness - don't touch!!!! It kind of feels like the flu, but no fever. I can not formulate a real thought - you should have seen me trying to speak on Monday and Tuesday. It was miserable. I feel like the Lord got me through it - but I was miserable and so frustrated. The doctor says it will be out of my body in 5 more days possibly. I am floating, but like a balloon with no air. It is the weirdest thing ever. Please remind me to NEVER be a drug user. I am not good at this. ha!

It is kind of like the saying - "Keep your mouth shut and they won't know you are a fool. Open it and confirm it for all to know." Well, i could keep quiet and just ride this thing out, but it is just too weird. I kind of want to go back to this in a week or so and see what I was like. I know - i just confirmed my weirdness! Pray for me.

I will be back just not until we are through this! I have email and will be checking it, but that is it. Keep praying for the Leslie Nease Survivor thing this weekend. We are expecting big things especially with the youth!! Thank you for your prayers. I know this too shall pass, but this is so weird............my poor family!! ha! Just me and Jesus - off to get on my face with Him!

5 comments:

Nicki said...

Praying!! Double time!!!

Stephanie (Ocean Mommy) said...

Sending up prayers for you today!!!

Fran said...

I've been sick this week Leigh and at one point I was so tired and sickly feeling that I couldn't answer my kids questions with words.....honest to goodness I grunted.

I hope we all feel better soon and I know this weekend will be glorious!! Praying for you now.

Hugs~
Fran

bikerchick56 said...

Leigh - Steroids are wonderful drugs, but they are perfectly capable of making any of us extremely shakey and irritable. It's not about you, and if you've got cellulitis, it's nothing to mess with (as you've already figured out). So I will lift you up in prayer, and may God keep you close, no matter WHERE you're 'floating' today. :)

Lisa

Speaking Thru Me Ministries said...

Hey ya'll - I am doing sooooooo much better! I do have to speak again this weekend. It would be an honor if you would pray for me.

Lisa, AKA, Bikerchick!! Do I know you and just don't recognize the name??? Thanks for the encouragment!!

have a wonderful week!