544 - So What Am I Suppose To Do?

Good Morning - I am up and at them this morning. On my way out the door to St. Louis for a few days. I will be speaking this morning and next. One of my favorite topics again - Beauty and the Bedroom and Authentic Parenting! Those are always so fun! As far as how I am doing physically - I am better. My nose did not fall off even though i wanted to have it taken off! The meds are crazy. I am jittery, but a bit tired too! Just a few more days of those kinds though! I will be staying at one of the event planners houses tonight which will be such a treat. I have been praying for her son that has a feeding issue - I am not sure of the specifics - but it will be neat to actually see the real little boy I have lifted up from time to time! God is moving and blessing Speaking Thru Me Ministries (STMM) - I am not sure I can keep up. We have needs - many needs! I know He will provide. Right now I think one of our greatest needs is organizational ideas and financing ideas - I don't really mean raising money. I need a truly trained accountant in Illinois that can tell me what I am REALLY suppose to be doing - I have so many odd questions! Need a sounding board. Our non-profit status is getting close! Maybe a few more months and it will be final!

Before I go on any further I feel impressed to ask or mention this. My friend, Nicki Koziarz over at www.threegirlygirlz.blogspot.com is feeling the call to a Speaking conference. She desires to go, but just does not have the funds available. This is the very kind of thing that I want STMM to be more a part of. Supporting the small church, supporting those desiring to do His thing, those needing help from "the church" - you and me. Nicki is a woman after God's heart, she is called by the Lord into ministry, and she is seeking with everything she has to do His will. She believes this is it, but just lacks the funds right now. Would you help? Go to her blog and see the details. I would beg you to give whatever you can... $5, $10, $50 - anything possible? I know you may not know her from Adam's House Cat, but this is certainly a wonderful thing to invest in - please trust me. I would love to pay this for her, but we just don't have all the funds to do that just yet here at STMM. Can you help? Thank you in advance!! (On a side note, Nicki lives in the town of the conference so she is not having to raise support for travel, just admission. and she is accepting paypal - or i will accept it and send it to her along with whatever we can raise around here.)

"I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I live in the body, I live by faith in the son of God who loved me and gave Himself for me." Gal. 2:20

So, have you ever asked yourself, really Lord what do you want me to do? I mean, I know I am to follow Your lead and do Your will, but what does that really look like. Can you give me some specifics? Have you ever been there? I so have and I ask that question almost daily. I know the general plan for my life - like being called into ministry, being a wife, and mom, church volunteer, etc. - but it is the day to day stuff that I can get a bit bogged down - what do I do with my day to day life?

I am going through Priscilla Shirer's study - Discerning the Voice of the Lord - INCREDIBLE!!! And this is all I can think about. Living and doing as He asks in the day to day things is all about listening and then dieing. That sounds exciting doesn't it? Well, actually so much peace comes with dieing! In a totality sense - we will be at complete peace when we die and see Him face to face.

But what about that day to day stuff. That is where I get stuck. The verse above says that I have been "crucified with Christ". That really means that my old ways have been put to death and I now live for Christ, with Christ, and in Christ. But the tough thing is that I am a living sacrifice - so I have the option of rolling off the alter and going back into my old ways. This is why it is so important to be discerning His voice in the day to day. As I roll off the alter the Holy Spirit gently at times says "No, No, NO - get back up there. Die, we did not wake that old part. You have not just been changed, you have been exchanged with the Spirit of Christ. Your soul now rest in my hands and I have exchanged your old ways with My new ways. Let's work this thing out together. Die and listen - all at the same time." Wow!!! What a sweet word He just spoke over me and you, the reader!! I can hardly go on!

Christ living in me - that is powerful. I am afforded all the riches, gifts, privileges, etc. that God has freely given to our Savior Christ and yet I think so often they go stagnant in my life. I do not tap into the power near enough!! Oh Lord - help to live in Your power!! You are the power! Tap into it and walk it out!! And how I need your power at this time in my life. So many things on the horizon and spiritual warfare at its peak. I need your power Lord! I am to live by faith - why - because you loved me and gave yourself for me. Incredible Lord - wow - I am getting it Jesus. Such an incredible concept, but it is really sinking in today. Praise you Father!

So ladies and self - ever talk to your "self" - what are we going to do with this today? Are we going to die and walk listening intently or are we going to live and ignore the voice of God? I choose to die and walk in peace!! Oh yeah!! In the day to day stuff this includes parenting, wifeing, eating, sharing in words, cooking, exercising, loving - what are we going to do? Live it out in faith walking with Him dieing to our own selfishness or are we going to continue in our pit of despair and depression possibly because we are continuing to walk on our own pleasing the desires of the sinful nature - ME, the fleshly me!! We are not a puppet, we are not a rag doll either - We are a princess, child of the Living God, bought with a price, and free to live!! We have a choice - what will it be today?? Listen - He is speaking!! I love you, Lord!

UPDATE******We are going to start our kids in the new schools next week - Carmi. Please be in prayer for that. We have 2 lookers on the house today!! Oh Lord, just need one buyer - please please please!! Let's make a deal and I ain't kiddin'. Our new house is about 2 weeks from being done. We have started moving a few things in - praise Him!! It feels so good! We have our huge first STMM event this weekend where we have brought in Leslie Nease from Survivor:China. She will be speaking in Carmi on Saturday morning 9:30am to the women and 6:30pm that evening to the youth. Many, many darts are being thrown by the defeated one - Crush him, Lord!!

543 - Overflowing HOPE

Wow oh wow - I think I might be reacclimated to the time and rested from the trip. That is one sure sign I am getting older. I can't just run to Alaska and run back and have no physical limitations. I was pretty good on Monday, but yesterday hit like a ton of bricks! So, here I am ready to get back on my devotions to the aerobics ladies and spur one another on in His love and in obedience. It was very difficult staying on the wagon while I was away. Sitting for hours in the airport, eating out constantly, eating at strange times to my body - need any other excuses? So I am thankful to be back and ready to hit the road hard. I am going to Salem today to speak to a Chrsitian Church. I am speaking on Beauty and the Bedroom. Yeah!!

"May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as your trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope and power of the Holy Spirit." Romans 15:13

I have to be honest and say that I am very hesitant to try to understand to any degree a verse that resides in the Book of Romans. This is a book that many very wise and successful teachers pray that the Lord never leads them to teach, preach through, or even dissect. It is a toughy! So I am just going to encourage you to take from this what you can, but please go back yourself and dissect it and see for yourself what it means for you!!

Have you ever tired to live without hope? Has there ever been a time when you thought all hope was gone? I have never been terminally sick, but I would think that might be a time when one might feel like all hope is gone. But is it possible? I can not help but remember the hope that overflowed from Jill and the Shea family as they together battled with their brother a very unknown and "untreatable" kind of soft tissue cancer. It very well may have been a strong moment - and I would think that too would be very reasonable to have those "strong" moments around a stranger (me)- but it was different too. I could just feel the stength and power and HOPE in the car as the mother, Mrs. Shea, explained about the cancer, the treatments they were trying, and how they were believing for a miracle. The same feeling came over the room - sense of HOPE - when I spoke with Jill Weiderholt (isn't that a cool last name) about her brother and his sickness. Her mom, Mrs. Shea, was nowhere around and yet it was the same - strong!! They were not taking anything but hope for an answer. It was powerful!

So I would think that for a Believer it would not be possible to runout of hope or be deplete of hope. The scripture above says that God is the God of hope. He can't help but be that and supply that hope!! But how - is there anything that is my responsibility? Yes!! The scripture also states that we must trust in Him. Not trusting in warriors, horses, or power as the Psalms read, but trusting in Him. I know for myself I can really think that I am trusting in the Lord and then find myself in a strong moment of doubt in a nano-second!! Is it possible to trust, but then not trust so quickly. I think it is. But I would also argue that there are those times that I am able to trust and it is beyond me. It is in those times that i see the results of trust - Joy and Peace as the scripture explains. I am "into" a situation and there is a calmness or peace and joy about me. Those are direct benefits of trusting the Lord or really I should say evidences of your trust - that you are filled with hope. I think that is really cool and a blessing. Thank you God of Hope!

Now look at this part - the second part of the verse. Can we explain what hope is exactly? When I try to put it into words I begin to recall the days of senior English when my teacher would demand us to describe a word without using that very own word. When I try to explain hope I keep coming back to the same word -HOPE! Hope, you just hope, you hope things turn out for the best, you trust in the hope He provides - it almost seems impossible to describe hope without using the very word. But God does it right here in this verse. "You may overflow with hope" - how do we know if we are overflowing with HOPE? We will be trusting in Him. And how do we know we are trusting in Him? We will have unexplained joy and peace. So what is the definition of hope as described in this verse????

Trusting the Lord Jesus by the power of the Holy Spirit and as a result there will be joy and peace as you walk through whatever He has ordained for your life - at that moment!! So now as we pray we know exactly what to ask for so that we can see the hope of our Lord manifested in our lives. Lord Jesus, fill me with the Hope of You. Help me to trust You so that i can see the fruit of joy and peace overflowing in my life. This is the very thing that will bring You glory. Joy and peace through the worst of things will be an evidence of hope (YOU) in my life and for all the world to see. It is your will that I bring your glory and honor through all situations and my displaying joy and peace will be a direct result of that HOPE!!!! You are HOPE - I trust!!

Thank you Father!! I needed to hear that today and I needed to KNOW that!! I love you!

540 - I need you, You need me!

This morning is off to a very slow start. We have roughly 5 inches of snow and ice!! It was beautiful for the first 3 inches, but then it was just like in a matter of seconds it started sleeting as if it had never snowed. It messed everything up including my trip to St. Louis. Ugh!! So we are all at home today and even Daddy. He got up around 3am to drive to Chicago, but I guess better judgement got a hold of him and hopefully my prayers. He is asleep on the couch with his car all scraped off - but it doesn't look like he even tried to pull out of the driveway. Hmm!!

I have decided that if I need to go spend the night in Evansville on Wednesday night so that I do not miss my flight to Alaska that is what I will do. I am so excited i can hardly stand it! I used to live in the very tip top of New York State and we had many below 0 days, but I am not sure I can quite remember those. I am sure it will all come back to me very quickly! HA!

I hope your 40 days of concentrated............well I am not sure what to call it.............is going well. Did you know that I had no idea it was Lent when I made this challenge. I have never celebrated Lent and my denomination really does not discuss it too much. So that is a really cool God thing - right? Maybe He wants me to pay more attention to that celebration - I just don't know much at all about it. I mean I know the basics, but that is it. Can any of you give me more details? So anyway - things have been going pretty well for me. I have had some very weak moments or times that I knew better, but did not say a word. There is a pizza joint in my town called DiMaggio's. Incredible!! My fav!! Well the little waitress in there knows me for some reason - we will not discuss why - but as soon as she sees me walk in she brings me a Dr.Pepper. Well of course she has done that recently and I just didn't have to heart to return it. No, really I didn't have the will power to return it - I caved to Dr. Pepper!! Yesterday was another bomb of a day. One of my friends invited me to lunch - her name will go unnamed, but she is a really cute tiny thing that doesn't have to diet and teaches aerobics. So we went to this place called Gottzz - or something like that. They have incredible cheese fries and cheesburgers. Ugh - i dove deep and didn't come out of the trap and up for air for a good moment in time. Ugh!! It was Patricia's fault..........yeah right!!!!!! Oops - didn't mean to release her name. ha ha! So, I start again today. Grace - thank you Lord! How are you all doing? Please tell me.

"He who separates himself seeks his own desire, He quarrels against all wisdom." Prov. 18:1 NASB

Sometimes don't you just want to get away and be by yourself. I do. It is especially after those times of terrible decision making or times that things have not gone my way. And if i do take someone with me or have to have someone with me in those times of aloneness it needs to be one that can wallow in the pit too and one that can agree things will not change. How bad is that - horrible, but just the way I want to be at times.

This verse above actually warns us in a round about way to not get sucked into isolation. Isolation done in the correct manner and with pure motivation can be a really good and healthy thing. Jesus often got away to pray and seek solitude!! But if you are isolating yourself or myself to escape from whatever it may be is really dangerous.

When we isolate ourselves and we are in a bad way - there is usually no wisdom to be had. I can begin "sharing" with myself all the terrible possibilites that can happen. I get very irrational in what I actually think might have happened in a situation - it gets all turned and twisted. The end of this verse explains exactly what we end up doing..."quarreling against all sound wisdom". If you are prone to depression or if it runs in your family really guard yourself from isolation when you know you are in a bad way. And I am assuming you know when you are in a bad way!

This is why we need each other desperately. Or at least I need you!! This all goes without saying that Jesus is by far the most perfect friend, can heal any imbalnace in our lives, and can work through any situation. But there are very, very many times Jesus will send a friend our way to be Himself with skin on. Right off hand I can think of very crucial times when Dori and Valarie have been that way for me. Many others as well - Courtney, Patricia, Andrea, Alisha ........it goes on and on. I need friends and of course my momma! Oh goodness gracious my momma!! What would i ever do without her!!! And many blogging sister as well.

Ladies let's try not to separate ourselves from one another. But on the other hand when one does go into hiding AND the Lord prompts you, seek her out and be that wisdom of hope seasoned with much grace and mercy. It is crucial that the Lord has prompted each one of us to seek that sister out or we might be an enabler by the words we give. We need each other - I need you and hopefully there will be some day that you need me. Sisterhood is the best ever!!

536 - Wax Off Wax On

Laced with Grace fantastic girls have asked me to post a devotion in Feb. and March. I am thrilled to be asked and wanted to let you know. My devotion will be up on Monday I believe. Hope over there and see what they are all about. Sweet, sweet new friends!

Below you will see the new STMM Prayer Blog button. I would just be thrilled if you would steal it and place it on your blog. I want everyone to know they can come to us at Speaking Thru Me at any time for prayer. The requests will not always be posted if that is what you require. It is all new to us so come on over and help us to know how to work this thing out!! We are also looking for prayer warriors... Thanks

"You were taught with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being currupted by its deceitful desires; to be made new in attitude of minds; and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness." Eph. 4:22-24

Do you remember ever getting into trouble and hearing your momma say, "You know better. I have taught you the right thing to do and you know better." Man, how bad did that make you feel? That is kind of what Paul is saying in this verse to the people of Ephesus. You have been taught right, you know what to do, now let's get on it. Just as the ignorance doesn't hold in a Court of Law, neither does "oops I forgot" or "Oh yeah, now I remember". That is one of those things about Christianity that is pretty tough. Once you have been taught and shown the right way then you are expected and accountable to do it. Rmemeber the verse that say "You know the right thing to do and yet do not do it - you are guilty of it all". Yes, Leigh paraphrase. We could get a legalistic, but no!! We can't live in that either. There is much grace - we just tend to go overboard with it much of the time! Or at least I do.

I hear God speaking to me this morning and saying - Girl, you know the right thing to do to gain control in certain areas of your life. (Yes, that is right folks, there is not just one area in my life that neeeds restraint and "fixin".) We have been through this before and you know the right way to go - get up and get after it. Put off that old self that ties you down, leaves you with much guilt, has many consequences, negatively affects those around you, leaves you bummed out in a way, etc... Throw down that old self, walk on top of it, and get on with life!! Let's not stay there and wallow.

I love that the verse 'admits' if you will, that we have much more than just an action problem. There is a mind game going on and must be reckonded with as well. "to be made new in the attitude of your minds; and to put on the new self". Isn't that the way it is? We have to get our minds straight, figured out, and thinking correctly many times before change sticks - putting on the new self. Oh there might be a brief change in action and for example much weight lost, but if we don't have a complete change of the mind or attitude we will go right back to the old way of doing things - especially when things go south and trouble hits.

So what are we going to do today - wax off and then wax on!! (I think it was said the reverse in the Karate Kid movie.) Take off the old ways of doing things and then put on the new self. Put on the right way of doing things - His holiness and righteousness. We know better any way, right? Wax off, then wax on. It is going to be a good day. My hubby comes home after being gone all week and I HAVE to go to Evansille today for a few things. Sure hate it - ha ha! I am already set on having a fantastic salad at Panera - greek!! Make it a great day in the Lord!

535 - Goose Necks Watching

Can you believe it is already Thursday? In some ways it has really been a long week and then in others ways - where did the time go? Yesterday was quite a busy day. For some reason for the past 3 days or more my windshield wipers would not turn off. You should have heard me racking my brain to think of some spiritual connection as to why they would not turn off - Did God have something to say about those things going back and forth back and forth!!!! Needless to say I spent some time with the dealer to get that under control. Thankfully it has not stopped raining around here for about 44 days - I am exagerating - so I needed them. But you know the feelings when surprises come up and your day is kind of halted. AND they had been delivered a huge platter of soft chocolate chip cookies just waiting for me to devour. hee hee - you see now where God was going with the wipers - it was a test............I thought of all of you spurring me on and I can report that not one single morsel was tasted or licked!!! Just deep inhales!! ha!!

"I make it my goal to please You, whether I am at home in the body or away from it." Phil. 1:20 paraphrase

What God has given us today is a bottom line verse - that is what I like to call it. Bottom line Leigh, you are meant to please Me whether you are alive or dead. What is it going to be? Don't you just love bottom line kind of requests or commands we might say here. Here is the "deal" - you are either going to do it here on the earth or you will do it when we are face to face. Wow!

The original verse says that we "eagerly expect and hope" to please the Lord. What that means is that one is stretching out their neck looking and waiting for ways to please the Father. One is expecting the return of the Lord and is living in such a way that when "caught" it will please the Father. We don't know when the return of the Lord will be, but if we have already met Him in Heaven then the plesure is all ours to be giving - perfect, not flawed in any way. But if He returns and we have not met Him face to face in death, what will be the scenario He finds us in. Ever thought about that? Interesting!

First of all, do you know that you will meet Him when He returns? Do you know the Lord as your Savior? Have you ever said - Lord Jesus come into my life and take charge. Forgive me of all my sins and make me whole. Lord, I want your salvation, I need your salvation. I want to be with you in Heaven some day. I confess I am a sinner and am asking you to come into my life. I confess You as the Son of God and I believe. Thank you Lord for making me a new person right this second!!! Lord, I am yours. Did you pray that prayer? Have you ever prayed that prayer? Oh please let me know if you received Christ as your Savior today!!!

Because we know Christ as our Savior, when He comes back to get us all it will be a glorious reunion. No matter what we are doing at that moment He will see us through the eyes of forgiveness and grace - of course judgement as well - but as a beleiver we will be His pleasure. Without knowing Him as Savior there is no way to please the Lord. Even as Christian there is nothing we can do to please the Lord other than accept His forgiveness and be His child! We could never do anything good enough to be accepted.

But in the mean time we have to live this thing out - life!! As you are going about your day, do you think about the very moments you are caught in and would it please the Lord if you saw Him face to face as if you were looking at a friend! Man that really convicts me. I think of those inner dark moments when I sit in digust, jealousy, frustration, and sin. Those times that I do nothing but cater to my flesh and selfish desires. What about those times I cave to indulgence - "Oh (surprisingly screaming) hey Lord - I didn't see you there. Yes, Sir, you are right, this is my 3rd donut..." Wouldn't that just be terrible. He comes back and I am stuffing my face again, caught in gosssip, stewing in jealousy, mad for only selfish gain, etc. Oh Lord, let us do everything to live a life worth of the calling. Let me live a life that is caught doing well to please You. Let us all live this thing out like it is real and we know You to be real!! Alive - I want to live and live every moment for you!!! I am stretching out my goose neack looking for ways to pelase the Father!! I love you Jesus!

533 - I just Gotta Know

This morning everything is so calm - not so much last night. Everything seems to be fine around here, but in Jackson, Tn. at Union University things have been turned upside down. Oh Lord as I was looking at their destruction I could not help but tear up. It is awful what the storm has done to the campus, but praise You all are ok at this time!! Our friends, the Neibels, have a daughter there and I have 2 cousins there as well. All are ok at this time. But oh how I wish I could have been there last night during the storm and after. This is a school that loves Jesus - the faculty, the administration, the students - for the most part. This is one of those times Union shines. I would have loved to seen all the kids gathered around for prayer - and I am sure some singing as well. I would have loved to seen all those professors that seem to be so stuffy out in the destruction and helping out. It is just how they are. Wonderful people! I would love to have seen the students helping one another - those that have never talked before for whatever reason. I would have loved to seen those of great faith still praising the Lord for all the world or town to see. I know my Union will rise again. I know things will be even better. I know they will rise up and say they are blessed. Just how they do things and how they raise their people and students!! Love it! I am praying Ps. 91 for them all.

"Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know." Jer. 33:3

Hope your yesterday went well. I had some huge voctories that I will not bore you with, but know that He is working in me. I do not have it all together - you know that if you have been reading this blog for any amount of time - nor do I pretend to have it together. So I am learning and claiming scripture as we go!! 2 days down - ......lots to go! ha! So how does the scripture above pertain to anything with being healthy and reaching goals? I will try to explain what I hear the Lord saying to me now.

Yesterday we really focused on calling out to one another - spurring on - for encouragment and help. I reminded you at the very end to never neglect Him in your cry for help, but that was not the focus. The neat thing was that I did not know today's verse would be about calling out to Him. God is making sure we never forget Him in our everyday living. He has a Word for us today - I can't wait to see how it ends up as I type... It is almost a mystery for me as I never know what direction He takes me when I am writing!!

I believe I have confessed to you that I am an emotional eater. I was scared last night in the storm and I wanted to chomp. When I am bored I want to chomp down. If i get mad - I want to take it out on some good chips. When I am celebrating nothing is better than hot chocolate chip cookies. Yep - that is me. I can find any reason to eat! But the bottom line is when I have some form of anxiety, stress, unknown - whatever you want to call it - I replace that faith in the Lord with food. Does anyone else do this? Please tell me I am not the only one.

Priscilla Shirer called me yesterday and told me that if "Christ would die for me then why in the world would He not speak to me". (Yes, she is my close friend.) This is it - very plain and simple today - When anxiety hits - when stress mounts - when emotions flare - when the unknown makes itself known with no deatils - when we want to know why we act a certain way or react a certain way - WE ASK HIM!! He is longing for us to search His heart - he seraches ours constantly! He wants to speak to us and tell us the whys and hows and the what to dos about things going on in our lives. He wants to reveal to us the way we should go because His plans are for our good, not to harm us. Jer. 29:11. He wants to be our destressor, our completor, our waymaker, our calmer downer, our peace!!!!!!!!! But we have to ask.

The word "call" in the verse above means to cry out looking for a specific answer. It is not or is rarely just a random cry out or call out with no purpose. It is the same word used when Adam called out the names of the animals. (There had to have been purpose with Hippo. hee hee) And the word "tell" means to give a specific answer when a question has been asked - to reveal - and it can mean to tell things one may not have any way of knowing. Lastly in that verse one of my favorite words - yada - means to really know, perceive, to understand - He will tell us things we do not know!!! Do you get it??? If we cry out, ask, call out to our Lord He will respond in such a way that gives peace with answers. He may not be extremely specific, but He might reveal "you are going to be fine" and that is worth knowing during major stress. He very well might tell you something very specifc for your life - He can and does and will - but we have to pause, take time out, and ask and THEN listen. Listen can be the hard part.

Our Lord wants us to turn to Him for guidance, to Him for solutions, to Him for consolation, to Him for restoration, to Him for refuge, to Him for answers................... not food that I do so often! Can anyone bear witness? Can anyone see this thing through with me? Can anyone hear me now? I need to yada - know!!

PS - is everyone's spell check not working on their blogger?

PSS - For those that don't know, I had a first cousin, his wife, and their 2 young boys killed in a tornado just a few yers ago - hense my fear of storms, etc.

PSSS - and no, Priscilla is not my real close friend - silly girl!

531 - Playing Defense -1

The Lord has laid something on my heart - not normal for my way of blogging - but something I will do to obey. I normally write out a prayer each morning after I have studied the scripture of how God has spoken to me. Well, I am going to do kind of the same thing, but it is going to be a more focused idea. My main purpose is going to be to offer encouragment to my aerobics gals for a period of time. I do not see them everyday and frankly, I do not even know 75% of them, but many of us are in the same boat. We want to lose weight or gain control of some area in our lives that is usually having to do with the body, etc. So hopefully every week morning I am going to post a particular scripture and devotion that we can hang on for the day. Of course all other readers are welcome to comment, be encouraged, and "play" along. I keep hearing the word "FOURTY" in my head. I am not sure at this point if I am to do this for 40 days, lose 40 pounds (ha), or if this is for 40 people. I don't know completely, but I am going to go 'forth' and just pray we all draw closer to Him thru whatever means. Please bear with me as spell check is no longer working on blogger and these devotions are just off the cuff - not rehearsed or thought about in advance.

"And the peace of GOd which transcends all understanding will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." Phil. 4:7

I don't know about you, but 95% of my battles happen on the playing field of my mind. If or once I finally get things straighten out there by whatever means, then things begin to pan out and look clearer. But until my mind has gotten some kind of clarity things can be extrememly testy at best. Why is that? Why can it take so long for me to realize that? Why am I so testy?

The selection of verses before this particular one speak about taking everything to God in prayer, not being anxious, being gentle, and rejoicing in the Lord ALWAYS. Those are some pretty tough things to accomplish when things are going rgeat, but when things have gotten hairy, wow oh wow, that is tough for me. But the point of Paul, the writer of Phillippians, saying all that is to make sure we understand that God has a reason for righteous living. God has a reason for giving us instructions on how to live - it will produce peace.

For me, I see the worst overeating spells when I am nervous (you ought to see me in an airport on the way to a speaking event), confused, and certainly mad. Now i do my fair share of destruction when I am happy and celebrating, and certainly when I am bored. But it seems like all control is lost when I am upset in any way. I throw all sanety out the window and then just go with my instant gratifications - eating! Been there? But this verse says that the peace of God......not just "can", but DOES surpass all understanding and THEN guards my heart and mind. Wow - that is powerful. But how do i step into that peace of God?

When we are under attack - self imposed or from an outside source - it is hard for me to have a clear mind and it immediately becomes a game of playing defense. I am trying my hardest to stand up against whatever it may be until I fall. That fall usually results in an brownie, Subway cookies, french fries, etc. I cave big time. But what should I have done?

1) Rejoice in the Lord - that means no matter what I am going through I will rejoice in the Lord saving me from the pit of hell and the fact that nothing can really destroy me - the fight may be tough, but in the end nothing can actually destroy me - not even death! So... FOCUS!

2) Gentleness - this is a tough one. In an attack I want to be a fighter with real punches thrown and at least words flinging. But this says we are to make our "gentleness evident to all". In tennis you never wanted the oponent to know you were afraid or mad - even at yourself. It would be an even better time to do something to the person to really irritate. Bottom line - we are fighting a war against the defeated one, satan. He can not whisper things in our minds, he can not control our steps, he can not make us do something. But he can persuade and "encourage" or remind of a previous event of failure. He is watching for how we react to everything thrown our way. We need to make sure our gentleness, calmness, not anxious... heart is evident. We need to display an attitude of one not to be messed with... to satan! He is one we are truly fighting, not a person, a problem, a sickness, or an attitude. the defeated one!

3) Don't be anxious. I know I am with you - this one is tough. But if we are rejoicing in the Lord, letting our gentleness evident to all - there is a good chance we can be anxious about nothing. Why - because we have brought everything to Him in prayer with thanksgiving! That is the key - we have to bring it to Him in prayer - not eloquently, but just simple cries out to the Father!

So what happens when we have done 1, 2, and 3? Then the peace of God will be obvious in your life and playing defense becomes playing offense! You have your defense mechanisms to play offensively with! Against all odds, or to those that are on the outside, your attitude and actions will not make sense in comparion to what is going on in your life. I will no longer feel the need to be validated by food. I will no longer run to food for my comfort. I will no longer eat to feel better or to share my problems with. No, the peace of God that transcends all understanding will be guarding my heart (emotions) and my mind (seat of logic).

Oh sisters - let's do it - just for today. "Gird up your loins" as my pastor used to say and fight!! We are running the race that is already won! Really it is. These are just little battles. I know some seem overwhleming and hugely frustrating at best sometimes, but claim the peace, claim the victory!!!!!!!!!! Let me hear from you! Write out that verse and take it with you everywhere...........today. We are only fighting today, not worrying about tomrorow!!

Lord - as for me, I hear you. I hear You loud and clear in my heart and head. You wil be my Guard, you wil be my Sustainer, you will be my Peace!! Oh praise you Lord. This is going to be a 40 day challenge. For 40 days I will write these notes of encouragemnt and strength from the Word. Oh Lord - surely not......... I don't know if I can do it. I don't even want to type it..... for 40 days I will not eat anything obviously unhealthy. Oh Lord - help!!! When is 40 days from now............oh Lord... I can do all things through Christ who strenthens me! Phil. 4:13

519 - Stuff with prayer

Today I go to the doctor for another ultrasound and appointment. I am excited to see if things have gotten better with that cyst because I don't "feel" it much anymore. I want to get my thyroid levels retested as well - that is one area I think there is no difference.

I still have not heard about the True Love Waits deal. I don't think that is a good sign.

We got a tiny tad of snow. Yeah, it is pretty!

I speak in Nashville on this coming Wednesday and then go to Wisconsin on that weekend. I need to tidy up my messages. These are great opportunities!!

Ginger and I have about 7 or 8 ladies actively applying for the speaker team and maybe 5 or so to inquire and praying about it. The website is coming along just as fast as we know how to do things. Ginger has been so patient with the guy doing it. Ginger met with a marketing agent to give us idea of getting the word out. Ginger and I would love the opportunity to speak to more churches - bring those please, Lord. Thank you!

Kids are doing well except Emmajoy's allergies are pretty flared up. She is pretty miserable.

The second floor on the house is being sanded right now!!! Touch ups on third floor are being finished and painting on the first floor should begin asap! Yeah baby!!! I think we are one month out!!! If we got in before the beginning of March then it would make sense to switch the kids in school, but much after that would be tough! Got the girls bunk bed - can't wait to put it together!

I think I have failed to update on this at all.........Aerobics at the church is the bomb!! We have around 37 ladies registered with anywhere from 20 to 30 on any given night. That is quite a difference in 20 and 30, but with every one's schedule that is just the way it is. We are praising God for this unbelievable opportunity to minister to the community this way. Grow us more, Lord. We have room!! The energy is awesome and the ladies are just so wonderfully thankful and friendly. I am excited to get to know them!

My Training Little Ladies - a class for anyone with any age girl about raising them up! I am hoping You will bring me a good number to love on and minister to! It will be on Sunday evenings at 6pm for 5 weeks. Intro class is next Sunday.

Kids have their first basketball games this Saturday. We are up to 3 kids playing sports - 3 different games at 2 different times since EJ and SJ are on the same team!! Blessing!

Thank you for any prayers. I appreciate you all!! Love, Leigh

507 - Post for Southern Illinois

Hey Everybody!!

I wanted to take a few minutes and let you know about 2 things upcoming - ok maybe 3.

1) STEP AEROBICS
Starting on January 7th, that is this coming Monday, we will begin another semester of step aerobics at FBC Carmi at 4:45pm. It is $75 for the semester, suggested donation. There is childcare!! Monday, Tuesday, Thursday, AND Saturday mornings. Saturday will begin at 7:30am, but no childcare. Get it done before the whole house starts the day! You will need a step, weights, mat or towel, and exercise band. There may be a few steps for sale on the first night if you don't have one just yet. Oh and on Saturday an exercise ball will be very helpful! Please let me know if you are interested. You will need to register, especially if you have kids. These classes are taught by Patricia Trout and Leigh.

2) Training Little Ladies - class taught by Leigh Gray
Starting Jan. 29 we will have an introductory meeting for a 6 week class actually starting on Feb. 10 at 6pm. This is on Sunday night and I am by no means trying to take you away from your church, but I wanted to let you know about this short class. We will be discussing contagious faith, birth order, love languages, mother/daughter relationship, daddy/daughter relationship, and a possible panel discussion to end the class. I am not claiming to have it all together - the jury is far from finished - but I was overwhelmed with the fact of having 3 little ladies!! So I began to research how to raise these little things! This is not my own info, but things I have discovered in research, interviews, and watching! Love to have you there. Please let me know if you have any questions.

3) Survivor Woman to Carmi
March 1 at approx. 9:30am Leslie Nease will be coming to FBC Carmi to speak to the woman of the church. She was on the recent Survivor show and is most known for leaving the Buddhist Temple. She was booted from the show on the 3rd week, but not ever forgotten. She is from Northern South Carolina and a radio host for a local Christian station. She is a very dynamic speaker. You can check her out at www.leslienease.com. This event is open to all, but will have limited seating - first come first serve. Brunch and Q&A after speaking.

Let me know if you have any question on the above info. Love to answer anything or register you for everything. Well, really only aerobics requires registration. Thanks for "listening". See you on Monday!

424 - Bring him harm??

Lord Jesus - wow what a great day. My baby Elleigh had a wonderful day at preschool and I had a great first day or work. Blessings, You are just too much Lord - thank you!! And let me tell you about aerobics. We are not able to have it through the college, SIC, but are just going to go straight through the church. LONG story, but this is best. Of course I was going to get paid through the college and it sure would have helped me to get this surprise additional money owed to the non-profit lawyer, but i know He will provide another way. It seems like He really wants to see His church (body of Christ) come through on this instead of directly from my pocket. It makes me more comfortable to just pay it, but I really think He is wanting to show me something in all this. Stretching my faith and showing me He can and will provide. What a joy to go through this with Him!

So aerobics - we had 14 ladies show up and 23 kids!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!ugh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It was awesome. The ladies were not beginners or at least did not act like it!! They got after it and we even had some screamers!!! How cool is that. For an aerobic teacher there is nothing better. I have heard Priscilla Shirer talk about how she loves her audience to talk back to her - same kind of thing with aerobics! If they don't "speak" then i think they are having too easy of a time and I push it up a level. I know in fact they could be out of breath and unable to talk, but usually............. oh it is just so much fun! I was able to start and finish with prayer and use all my Christian aerobic music. I was feeling a little unsure about that with SIC. Lord, thank you - bring us more!! It is going to be a great outreach for my church!! Yeah!!!

Went to bed at 9:30 last night. I could barely eat dinner I was so exhausted. I sent off one purse yesterday and got another order for 2 more yesterday. Iris is going to use one for another giveaway - is she precious or what!! You will have to check it out. It is later this month. Boomama has been slammed with a few things and so that contest giveaway might start later today or tomorrow. Nevertheless it too will be great! Thank you Jesus!!! Also had another lady say that she was going to send $25 and the Lord told her no - send $100. Can you believe that - wow, HE rocks!! This is going to be paid off way before i or the lawyer is expecting and I may not have to wait until my first real paycheck!! Thank you, Lord oh bless you Father!!!

"She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life." Prov. 31:12

Man that is such a small verse that packs such a powerful punch. Before I dissect the verse I want to think about how I bring harm or even potential ways to bring harm. Now I know there is a good chance I can bring some harm to the dinner table, but I think this verse is talking a little bit more about other things. How about when he walks out of the closet on Sunday morning or any morning and we say things like "I sure hope you don't think you are wearing that. or When did you ever think those 2 colors go together?" Sometimes we are really just kidding and having fun, but i am a firm believer in there being a tad bit of truth in every joke. And many times it is truth we want brought out, but are afraid to really say it honestly. Being a non-confrontative person that can be my trick!! Coward - that is nothing but a coward!

Some of the greatest harm we can do to our men is hurting their self-esteem. So the nagging, disgust, complaining, rejecting, comparing, the "wishing you had more or what someone else had" - all of it speaks to him and it brings him harm. It says to him that he is not good enough, he can not do enough, he can not live up, you wish you had hers, - dog gone-it, he can not cut the mustard! Even the best man, i include the deacon and preacher, if put in the right situation with lack of attention and support will or at least can cave to great failure. A man has to be pumped up and if all we are doing is bringing harm he will go elsewhere to be validated - even if it happens subconsciously! Bring him good, not harm!

Brings - "gamal" - to become ripe, make ripe, to do,perform, accomplish, repay. Can denote doing good or evil. We are going to be bringing him something. Let's try to being him fresh, sweet fruit that is beautifully ripe, and not anything that is old, soured, and overripe! Don't you hate brown bananas!

good - "tub" - to do well, be pleasing. lovely, delightful, joyful, FRUITFUL, kind, cheerful. Bringing him good has much to do with joy. Yes our husband are the ones that we tell everything too, but do we overload him at the wrong times. We are to bring him joy and be a joy. There are times that I want to spill everything to Clay and he just can not take another thing in. I have had to learn it is not that he is rejecting me he just can not take another thing in! I think a lot of guys are like that - especially after work. They need to decompress. Be a joy and bring them joy - do them good!

harm - "ra" - to do evil, be wicked, evil in thought or action, harmful, unpleasant... Wow, that is quite a contrast. I think of evil as very, very bad things.... much worse than unpleasant. But doing harm to the husband when you get to the root of the motivation like in the jokes i talked about earlier it can be very, very evil!! And i love that it explained it could be in thought or action. Many times what we allow to go on in our brain is worse for our husbands than the truth spoken out. We conjure up things that have not happen, but we are sure did. Or at least what he was thinking. So we harm him in our minds and it effects they way we treat him next time we see him or talk to him! Oh Lord, help me to do good!!!

days of her life - that is exactly what you expect. her lifetime, but specifically it can mean a sphere of time or section of time in her life. No, matter what phase of life we find ourselves still we are to bring good and not harm!!

Thank you Father for a wonderful day. Help me to be more kind to my kids when i am so tired. May they not get the brunt of my exhaustion. May I bring them joy and good not harm as well. You are knocking my socks off and if you happen to wear some I hope that I can do the same for You by having a pleasing heart and right actions!! I love you my Lord!!